"Vi For The First Time"

The GUI's not enough, the time is neigh,
The old-timers laugh when you call it "vye".

Undaunted you rush to continue,
But see no scrollbar and no menu!

You press the keys with no effect,
You discover your "mode" is not correct.

You grab the mouse and try some clicking,
Nothing happens but the clock keeps ticking.

Can't insert, can't delete,
And the cursor keys won't repeat.

The screen blurs, your fingers shake;
You forgot to press escape.

Too soon you hear the words you dread,
"Time's up!" the teacher said.

Try to quit, but you can't leave;
An extra "bang" is what you need.

-Author Unknown